I made another trip to QuickChek, as I often do. But this trip was not like the others. Normally I look around a little for my prey. Sometimes the clerk will wonder why I'm looking around for so long, but other than some judging it's a standard procedure.
This time? Not standard procedure. I found my snack. I got in line. This was my first sign. The line wrapped around like three displays. That never happens. Why was it taking so long for everyone to check out? Something's fishy.
I get in line and go to check my phone. As I glance downwards I see something no one wants to see in a store with food. The guy in front of me didn't have any goddamn shoes on. How did he get there? If he walked he crossed a busy street barefoot which, I may say, is quite dangerous. No amount of delicious brownies is worth stepping on a screw and getting tetanus.
Next up was Big Bertha. This big, big, BIG lady walked in after I saw Shoeless Sam. Every step she stopped and had to take a few breaths. I could hear her breathing from a solid 20 feet away. Somebody get this lady a scooter with a basket. Nothing will her stop from a footlong sub and F'Real shake!
Make it out the store safely, if not a little rattled. Get outside and what happens? Two teenagers start making out in front of the dumpster. Hey idiots, it's a Thursday. I'm not drunk enough to laugh at your desperation. At least go behind the dumpster. Or maybe get a job and buy a fucking car! Fucking kids these days.
Finally I get to eat the brownie. I was so taken aback by the night's events that I could barely compose myself long enough to enjoy the brownie. But you know what? It was still delicious. QuickChek makes delicious brownies and I won't let a handful of undesirables ruin it. 9/10
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