Muthafuckin' Twinkies

     Since my past two blogs weren't snack related I decided to get back to basics.  Write about a snack of people.  A real work horse.  And that snack is the Twinkie.

     Idiots everywhere collectively shat their pants when Hostess went under.*  "Oh no how will I ever get a generic cake food filled with generic white cream!"

     There's a Weight Watchers Twinkie ripoff.  What's the matter, afraid of actual losing weight on your diet?  There are 7 ripoffs right there in addition to the real Twinkie.  Look at this absurd Reddit thread politicizing Hostess going under.  Hey idiots, companies go under.  New companies form.  Companies steal ideas from other companies.  The iPod was hailed as a technological breakthrough by Apple ballwashers and that's just an MP3 player with a stupid file format.  Hostess just had a better marketing campaign than Market Basket and Blue Bird.  (Although to be fair even BP has a better marketing campaign than those snack food heavyweights.)

     On a topic related to actual Twinkies, try sticking one of these bad boys in a toaster oven.  Make sure your Twinkie is refrigerated first.  Lay down a piece of aluminum foil in the oven and put the Twinkie in for ~20 seconds.  The cake will warm up slightly but the cream will stay cool.  A surprisingly satisfying juxtaposition!  5/10

     PS- What the fuck is a 'Bingle'?  I had to Google that one.  The two hits were Bingle, an Australian car insurance firm, and Lara Bingle, a smoking hot Australian chick.  Also Blue Bird is Australian so I guess that's a real world down there?

     PPS- I think I should do a Twinkie ripoff ranking.  That should stave off boredom for another 45 minutes.

*On a related note, how come GM went under and got bailed out, but not Hostess?  This is Michelle Obama's America!