My Birthday Was A Disaster

     As many of you know, yesterday was my birthday.  If you don't know then I'll keep this in mind next time you need someone to help you move.  I ate two cakes.  I also managed to avoid all coworker interaction (you call it antisocial, I call less distractions).

     So you can imagine my displeasure when I got home and found out that a chocolate truck (thoughts and prayers RPI) spilled on a highway in Poland.  Look at this mess:

Washington Post- The vehicle, which was carrying about 12 tons of chocolate, came to rest across the median barrier, spilling its sweet fillings across six lanes of the A2 motorway and blocking traffic in both directions between the towns of Wrzesnia and Slupca in Western Poland
     Buddy, spare me your jokes.  It's almost 1 am when I'm writing this.  I had a nice little birthday dinner, two birthday cakes, went to band practice and wrote a song, and then did some power cleans at the gym.  I'm too busy being a renaissance man to hear you crack jokes about this being the Hershey Highway.  I've taken many a ride on the Hershey Highway, and buddy, this isn't it.  The Hershey Highway is a magical place.  It's nothing to make fun of.

Video by local media showed a loader scooping up some of the brown goo. The liquid chocolate began to harden, which made cleaning up more difficult, local authorities said.

     And here I was having a good birthday.  Now I have streak marks ruining the evening commute.  I get enough of those during lunch time.  Once that thing dries up you'll never get it out.

She told TVN24 that the cleanup crew, which was using hot water to melt and wash away the chocolate, was in good spirits, according to NPR.

     I'm glad someone's happy about this.  "Look at us melting this delicious chocolate! LOL!"  And who the hell uses water to melt chocolate?  Now your chocolate is just wet.  Be a real man and leave the chocolate in your pocket all day.  No one can see your pockets so it doesn't matter if they get stains.  

     I know Poland is a beautiful country that will find a way to overcome this national tragedy.  I'm sure we can all come together peacefully-

Time- The legislation criminalizes any mention of Poles “being responsible or complicit in the Nazi crimes committed by the Third German Reich.” The harshest penalties are reserved for those who refer to Nazi-era concentration camps such as Auschwitz as “Polish death camps.” Only scientific research into the war and artistic work are exempted.

Alright maybe I'll avoid Poland for a while.