New Chips Ahoy S'mores

(Apologies if the formatting on this blog is screwy, I'm writing it on my phone)

     As a Boy Scout (Eagle Scout, not to brag) I naturally love smores but am subpar at making them myself.  So of course when a smores cookie comes along I'm excited.

QuickChek Rocky Road Cookie

     To start off, I didn't know rocky road was a flavor for anything other than ice cream.  So this blog was as much a reconnaissance mission as it was a cookie review.

New Oreo Alert: Choco-Chip Oreos

     Again with the small packaging...

Third Eye Blind Apparently Heard What Ted Cruz Said About Rock Musicians

     Remember when I said adieu to the Human Slimebag and said my blood pressure would have less spikes?  Well that was partly true.  Less spikes due to Cruz, yes, but apparently a diet like mine isn't good for your health.  But I digress.

Drake's Funny Bones

     There is nothing funny about Funny Bones.  As everyone knows I am not a fan of misnomers.

Cool Off This Weekend With A Nestle Tollhouse Ice Cream Sandwich

     In case you haven't noticed, or if you don't live near me, it's hot as muy caliente (that's Spanish for balls).  What's the best way to cool your body off?  Cryotherapy.  Unfortunately, I don't have access to that so I had to settle for ice cream.

Goobers Would Be More Successful If They Didn't Have A Stupid Name

     Seriously how fucking stupid a name is "goober?"  It's two switched letters away from booger.  According to Wikipedia, goober is another word for peanut.  That's not a good excuse.  You know about the Chevy Nova?  In South America it didn't sell.*  No one realized that "nova" and "no va" are the same thing, and "no va" means "doesn't go."  Fucking think ahead for me one time.  Goober is a stupid name.

Swedish Fish Are Only Kinda Swedish

     Blogger's note: that picture looked significantly clearer on my phone when I took it.  Come on Andrew, be better.

I Stopped At Stewart's For A Twofer

     During the trip back from Saratoga a few weeks ago we made a gas stop at a Stewart's.  The shop was like 10 minutes from the highway so we just assumed we missed the Stewart's at one point and kept going until we hit the next town.  But I digress.

A&W "Candy Twists" (wink wink)

     If you're wondering what a candy twist is, think of a Twizzler but without the copyright.  Then add some A&W flavoring and that's exactly what this is.  Like when the supermarket sells cream filled sandwich cookies.  We all know it's an Oreo but you don't want to get sued.